• Heart,  Writing

    Mourning the Loss of Expectations

    Feeling sad today. Missing travel. Missing Main Street, USA at Magic Kingdom. Fearing that awful, monstrous…The Unknown. I don’t shove these feelings down. I don’t scold myself for not trusting God enough for not having enough faith. Please. The Bible is pretty much ALL people who aren’t enough but for whom God decides to Be everything. He’s always filled in the gaps, where we aren’t enough. No, what I’m doing is recognizing that my expectation for life does not match reality. The journey of letting go of expectation and accepting reality is called grief. It’s a crucial part of our mental health. Grief is tricky. It messes you up to…

  • Christian,  Christmas,  Farm life,  Minsitry,  Women

    The Two G’s: Grief and Gratefulness

    Dear Sisters, My sister Tricia Baines passed December 19, and the cows on the farm began dying by New Years. When the Baines family heard, they packed up and headed south to the farm to help out. By the time we arrived, over 100 cows were put down, and Thomas ( my brother-in-law), Caleb, and Peyton (their children) had been vaccinating, tagging, and hand-feeding the calves left without a mother. How ironic! Peyton was feeding the last sick Momma cow by hand. When I heard the news, I prayed all the way to the farm God would heal that cow for Peyton’s sake. Although, one morning Peyton stated matter of…